Captivity in freedom

This morning I was reminded of a dream that I had a few years ago. In the dream I was walking down a sidewalk with a man. Somehow I knew this man's past and future. Without being told, I knew that when the man was born, he had been immediately bound to a chair. He grew up in shackles of iron. But this man had been freed from the chair - liberated. It was clear. Since I found myself walking with him, he was obviously free to walk, even run. To live. To move. To dance!

Sadly, I also knew his future. I knew that he was on his way back... As we walked and talked I could not hear the conversation because all of my attention was distracted by the knowledge that although he'd been freed from the chair, his every intention was to go back to sit in the chair, broken shackles and all. On this day, it was his choice. On some days he returned carelessly out of habit. There were also days when he wanted desperately to stay out of it, but felt driven to return. And, although he couldn't put it into words, that chair had become a comfort to him despite the terrible nature of his former captivity there. His farewell to me was cheerful... but only on the surface.

The Ebb and Flow

I referred to the "ebb and flow" in Tuesday's post... Here's my thought behind that comment:

The ebb and flow
Of love and opponent
Of other and self
Of later and moment
Takes the soul
On a road
With twists and turns
That further the journey
Toward God

Jesus is messing with me...

So, I think Jesus is messing with me. In a good way. He's doing tons of stuff to get me out of my comfort-zones and into places where I have to trust Him. I read most of McManus' new book "The Barbarian Way" last night. That's been great for shaking up the whole picture of what God is doing in life and ministry right now...

An aside - I'm noticing how easily tiny, off-handed comments and big faith-stretching experiences both have equal power in adding to or taking away from our level of faith. I guess that level of power comes from our willingness to "buy-in" to those comments or to "fear" the big stuff...

Grabbing Moments

I planned to have time today - time to just sit and be quiet. But it turned out that there was more running to do than sitting. Into the ebb and flow... again.

So, grabbing moments of quiet is the order of the day. Where to find them? Turning off the radio while driving... Plenty of opportunities while waiting in line... Finding the quiet room of rest...

Moments are all we have. This moment is where we are. At the same time I wonder if, in some ways, it's the giving of the moments where we get them back?

Sacred Pathways

I've been reading through a book called Sacred Pathways for a class that I'll be teaching in the fall. It's firming up alot of things that God has taught me by "trial and error" in trying to figure out how to grow in my relationship with Him. The formula of church attendance and a thirty-minute devotional time has long been rendered stagnant for myself and many others. Since we usually enter into that experience from a place of little or no spiritually significant time, that "formula" helps for a time.

But eventually we find that we just have to grow closer to God. We realize that there are greater depths and higher heights and we long for more of Him. It's kind of like we start a relationship through love-letters and dinner-dates. For the relationship and especially romance to blossom we've got to move beyond those times.

I'm excited about helping people to understand these "new" (but not really new) ways to connect with God through understanding their own physical/emotional makeup and freeing them up - NOT to leave behind church attendance and devotional time - but to build onto those good things. After all, they are not the end so much as they are the means to an end which is the growth of their relationship with God.

Re-entering America

Coming back into the "home" culture has been a different kind of experience over the past two weeks. Previous mission work in India and Ireland had two different kinds of impact on my life and thoughts...

India left me grieving. The experience of the "third-world" within a few feet of "first-world" was a shock to the system. Then coming back to see the vast difference between the American church and the world church had me in tears.

The first year in Northern Ireland left me looking for a beautiful place. I soon realized that I would not find that which I was seeking on this side of heaven.

This time, I return from Northern Ireland seeking something that matters - something significant. To work so intentionally for ten days and then return to the "mundane" is a time of sadness and searching...

As with most people's re-entry experience, there is somthing of a struggle with others understanding the experience. A quick poem to work some of that out:

Either no one cares
or they don't know
what to do with all we have to share...
Questions with a desire
to know all is well -
but it's not... it's not...
And conversation shifts
to the importance of the irrelevant,
the urgency of nothing to do
or be done
as stares fill the space
of the still in our living rooms

a life observed...

A life observed is a life well lived. It is the life from which we can learn and grow. Writing has been the best way to accomplish this in this little life of mine. So there you go...